It was my first day back from Mexico (vacation) so when I stepped on the scale I was basically dreading the number. We were in Mexico all week and I had many forces working against me, including being faced 100 times a day by some of the best food on the globe. Do you realize street vendors sell whole cobs of hot corn dipped in cream and coated in cheese...on a stick? Don't even get me started on Tacos el Pastor (spit-roasted shaved seasoned beef hugged by a piping hot, freshly homeade corn tortilla--topped with a tiny slice of fresh pineapple). Gawd.
By far the more significant challenge was staying eight days with my husband's 2 sisters and mom. This trip really isolated something we all suspect is true but rarely have a chance to prove--that a stress trigger for food abuse is far more powerful than the temptation trigger (smells/sight). At least, for me it is.
I realize now also that the issue is mostly my husband's older sister. She is a smart and good-hearted person, but being around her exhausts me! She is incessantly over-coordinating things, hen-pecking, and can be downright despotic about doing things her way. If you hesitate or pause for a moment to think about what you're doing or a problem your trying to solve, she takes over whatever you're doing. If she's not taking over, she's watching--ever vigilant for the opportunity to take over what you are doing. If I'm exhausted being around her it must be truly exhausting to BE her. lol! It was like spending a neverending day in a store where you really just want to look around, but the clerk sticks to you like glue; pointing things out as if they have any idea of your taste or budget...telling you you should try this...try that...asking you questions, making distracting small talk, etc. But also imagine this clerk insists that you do this this way, or that. Compound it that most of the advice and direction you recieve is about how you parent your son.
I couldn't really even get a moment alone with my husband because even when we're in a group I notice my sister in law sort of evesdrops on our conversations--looking for opportunities to weigh-in and share knowledge. And on the four hour car ride back to the city I made the mistake of asking her something about Mexico's history. I had planned to listen to my music or watch a movie on my laptop for the car ride but that innocent question triggered a two hour long review of Mexico's management of water, sanitation, immigration management in the US, etc and so on. So much for netflix sitting longingly in my bag...
There is so much more. Honestly this trip was commical in how you can reach such high levels of annoyance and frustration just being around people too much. Mostly I was paying attention to how interactive tension or relational stress influences my food behaviors. Although it didnt' completely restore my control, the awareness was helpful and impactful in that I didn't gain.
One thing that really helped me was to eat a very low calorie and healthy breakfast every day so that I wasn't starving for lunch. I also limited meals out to once/day. We were travelling so it wasn't possible to have my JC meals regularly so that was the compromise. I tried to continue to "decide" between alcohol OR dessert as well.
Well, Thanksgiving hurdle is overwith. Bring on Christmas! Hope everyone else had a great week!
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