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08 сентября 2014

My weekend of opportunities, was just that, and I'm thrilled I took the opportunity to eat and live healthier and happier, and transition from the weekend to the weekday without overeating. So, I'm taking this opportunity to pat myself on the back and say "that-a girl"! Of course, the never-ending over-evaluaitng me, wants to understand why this weekend and Sunday night in particular went so well and really were so much easier. While I may never truly know, I do know that each step in that direction that I want my healthy highway to go, better establishes that route and those habits. So, as the quote that spoke to me said, I'll continue to work to "focus my energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new."

The main differences I see in this past weekend compared to others of the past, was I stayed curious and open to my feelings and to others. I connected with online & IRL friends, rested and took care of me when I needed to while staying open to outside invites. Even though yesterday's plans changed throughout the day as DH debated what he should do -- He ended up visiting his brother in the hospital, their autistic son who was having a hard time at his group home and then we with our DS took his cousin's son out for dinner at the beach, which proved to be a beautiful night, relaxing & fun. After the long weekend, both DH & I were tired and went to bed early, so no further distractions were needed. And, now I'm up early, feeling great and ready for my early workout, rested & refreshed. But before I get on with my day, which after my workout will be heading to work to get things set there for my time away (I leave Weds for Cincy to see my Mom), I'll pray --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I'll pray, breathe, log, journal, stay curious & express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion. I'm so very grateful for God's guidance on this new route, for each and every one of caring you, my family & IRL friends, feeling great after a happy and healthy weekend, making the best of opportunities, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(7 комментарий)

07 сентября 2014

TGISun, and chalking up another good one ATF & ATL. It's great to have SIL with us, and we had a nice dinner out with our friends. I ate healthfully and mindfully, which is the goal. And, mid afternoon yesterday I started to feel some cravings but knew I'd had a filling lunch and it wasn't true hunger, but boredom instead as I trudged through some more of the never-ending book work. But instead of heading to the kitchen, I headed to my bed for a rest as I'd not slept well the night before. It worked, and avoiding eating my emotions felt great!

So, my plan is to repeat that mindfulness today, staying curious each time I want to eat. Todays plan are still up in the air, depending on when SIL leaves and DH. He or we may go see his brother again and/or take his cousin's son out to dinner. We'll sort that out after SIL goes. But, I'm feeling good, & better and better about flexible/unknown plans… that I can adjust as needed, but have my tool kit at hand if I should need it to deal with any emotions that may arise and try to disguise themselves as hunger.

And for tonight, I have a good book ready and ideas for a movie, if that turns out to be what's needed to build new healthier ways to spend my transitional evening. Knowing I have yo on my side and can journal whenever needed is high on the list of options for the evening too! So, to start the day right, I'll begin in prayer --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I'll pray, breathe, log, journal, stay curious and express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion. I'm as always, so grateful for each of caring you, my family and IRL friends, beautiful weather, the good feeling that avoiding emotional eating brings, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(5 комментарий)

06 сентября 2014

TGISat! I had a good day yesterday - ATF (all things food) and ATL (all things living). And, I'm ready to further my progress on this WOO (weekend of opportunities)!

Yesterday I got an impromptu invite to go to lunch with some of the ladies I play indoor tennis with, and unlike always needing to plan ahead me, I changed my plans to run errands and went to lunch instead. It was really nice to catch up with them, as in the summer I play tennis outside with a different group of ladies. I've played with these indoor tennis friends for 10+ years, and we all get along quite well, socialize some off the court and have traveled together for tennis events. We're talking too of a girls weekend away sometime soon.

I had a bit of a revelation ater that lunch as I realized just how restrictive I can be in my WOE (way of eating) during the week. I think this may play into my overeating on the weekends, but again who knows which comes first... the chicken or the egg. I rarely accept lunch or dinner invites during the week because of my weekend splurges, and concern of the number on the scale. So, I'm going to try to begin to expand my horizons on what I eat weekdays and see if that takes away the desire to eat more on the weekends. And I'll casually keep an eye that my waist doesn't expand at the same time! Because of my disordered eating history and lingering tendencies, my focus is gratefully and healthfully being more & more directed toward mindfulness and finding ways to eat & life healthfully & happily, and away from the compulsions of the past.

In my drive home from lunch, I also felt a huge amount of grateful to God for his direction on my journey and a wonderful sense of accomplishment in how far this old gal has come. Like many here, I don't give myself much credit for these small milestones, but milestones they are for each of us working hard to eat and live better. So, to continue that today, before I head to spin class this morning and to an afternoon/evening with friends & SIL, I'll pray --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And through this one day of this one weekend of opportunities, and each one meal, bite, thought & emotion, I'll pray, breathe, journal, log, stay curious and express my way. I'm so very grateful for each of gorgeous you, my family & IRL friends, all the learning and life lessons this journey brings and appreciating each accomplishment along the way, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(7 комментарий)

05 сентября 2014

TGIF! I tend to save quotes that really speak to me in my "notes" on my electronics. I was re-reading them last night, and came upon this -- "The secret to change is to focus all your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new." How appropriate for me at this stage in my healthy eating & living journey as I embark upon another weekend opportunity to eat & live more healthfully and mindfully. And, that's exactly my plan, to build new healthier, happier habits in place of the emotional eating of my past.

Ready to join me on the ride? One day at a time, and this one day includes tennis a little later (indoors starts again today, which while I love to play outside in the nice weather, today's humidity makes it a pleasure to go back inside) and a mani/pedi this afternoon. No plans tonight, but a busier weekend ahead with DH's sister coming tomorrow for the night. She wants to visit BIL who is hospitalized in treatment for depression. DH has a memorial service for a childhood friend tomorrow afternoon then golf and we're joining him and 2 other couples for dinner after. One of the other wives, one of my dearest IRL friends, and I will hang out while the guys golf then go to mass before dinner. On Sunday morning, we're biking with these same great friends and may take DH's cousin's son out to dinner. He just started college in our town and away from his home in upstate NY (3-4 hours from here). So, I'll enjoy the peace and quiet tonight and gear up for the busyness to follow, knowing I have a plan and better options than eating any emotions, including fatigue, that may arise. And as always, one of those options is to pray, which I'll do now --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And through this one day of this one weekend of opportunity, and each one meal, moment, bite, thought & emotion, I'll pray, breathe, journal, log, stay curious & express my way. I'm so very grateful for each of awesome you, my family & IRL friends, each new day and new weekend and the opportunity it brings to progress toward health and happiness, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

(8 комментарий)

04 сентября 2014

I had a good conversation with my health coach yesterday about my continuing struggles with sugar cravings on evenings of transition. I'm making such progress at other times… progress, not perfection… but I'm finding there is still an opportunity to eat and live healthier on those evenings when I transition from the weekend to the weekday or from traveling to home again.

I had come up with the thought that I needed to re-frame those evenings from stopping a bad habit of overeating healthy but sweet (added sugar free) treats, to finding a new healthier habit as a way to spend that time. Those evenings, though, can be after a number of different activities during the day, so I'll first & foremost take them one at a time. But, I like the idea of retiring to our bedroom early to watch a movie, pre-recorded tv show or read a book. My health coach suggested taking that a step farther and saving a special movie, show or book for that time… to keep my eyes open during the week for a special, relaxing treat to watch or read instead of the sugar treats I've been having. And, we spoke again as we have in the past, that for a sugar addict like me, nothing may immediately feel as good as those first few bites of something sweet, but eating and living healthier through that transition night will feel so much better long-term.

She also mentioned, as the mindful eating approach would also suggest, that for those who can eat sugar in moderation, that having a special, more decadent sugar treat eaten mindfully & truly savored may stop the need for more than one healthy sweet option and the searching for more that I can do. While I absolutely agree that for someone who can eat and relish that one decadent serving and be satisfied with it and move on, that is a great option, but for me that has not been my experience. For as I've said before, for me, that one bite of added sugar is too much as 100 bites are still not enough. So, this added sugar abstainer, will continue my course in that direction knowing there is another fork in the road to try if I choose to at some point on my journey.

On another note, we discussed my weight which has stayed up a bit as I focus instead on healthy eating & living and, finding what works for me. So, I revised my goal to a number I'm more comfortable with and that I think I can more easily maintain. I also changed (which I just realized that I could) that annoying "weigh in now" reminder to only remind me every 4 weeks. I'll weigh in when I want to, thank you very much! Please don't' get me wrong, that number on the scale is still very important and with my disordered eating past, always will be. But, I'm continuing to realize and emphasize that I'm so much more. I'm healthy, still slim by many standards for a 54 year old, 5'5" woman and my body fat is still quite low at 14%. So, this is my farewell for now to obsessive weigh ins!

So, that's my story and I'm sticking to it! I've been to early morning workout already and am off to see another potential memory care facility for my Mom this afternoon -- the last in my tour as I go to see my Mom in Cincy next Weds hoping to get a better idea of if/when I should move her. So, now, I'll pray --

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

And I'll pray, breathe, log, journal, stay curious and express my way through this one day and each one meal, moment, thought, bite & emotion. I'm so grateful for each of always there you, my family & IRL friends, more gorgeous weather in the northeast, feeling good about my progress on this journey with hope that more progress is ahead, and having the health & wealth to live this life I love! xoxox

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