jsfantome- Журнал, 08 ноя 11

Over time, it has taken me a lot of effort to learn how my emotions impact my daily routine...how they propel me forward, leave me spinning my wheels, or sometimes throw me in a ditch! Just when I think I'm in a good place, getting my head wrapped around what I need to do, what commitments I need to make to myself, how I am going to implement what I want to accomplish... I get thrown an emotional curveball that leaves me feeling - sad.

Sometimes the repetive process of this site works to my advantage. And often times, the best part of my day is connecting with friends here. Lifting one another up, cheering each other on...being a listening ear when times are frustrating or hard, or just plain confusing. This journey has been all of those things to me. And to others. And often I thank God that I found this refuge where I can connect with people who are - or have been - going thru the same (or similiar) issues... because with that kind of support... I have lived to fight another day!

All that inspiration, motivation, and cheerleading has helped me. It made me feel good, when I felt like crap. It helped me try one more meal... when what I really wanted to do was just say 'screw it' and give up... It helped me to get out the things I was thinking, the feelings I was having, the frustration created by a momentary feeling of failure.

How does someone who has come so far...feel like they can be a failure. At times, it's rather easy. Especially, when everything you are working for...is the same thing everyone else is working for... to lose than singular, elusive pound. And each try, and each step, and every attempt and effort, was cornered by a scale that just simply replied: NOT!

However - I pushed on. And I'm still in it. Still working towards my own personal goals. Still trying to look at each period of time with some reflection to learn my lessons well. God knows I don't want to repeat this journey. It's not be the most fun, or even the most rewarding thing I have ever done.

But it has been good for me. Good for my emotional health. Good for my state of mind. I am happier. And healthier. (than when I started, for sure.) I will keep working towards learning. And keep an open mind about where others are at in their own journey. I will offer a hand to those that want help. And I will support those who have a need. I will cheer on those that come to this site... cause I am sure they all need it at one point or another.

And I will still be me. I will still remain true to the need to be honest. To point out the things I think are worth reflecting on... even if it's just to an audience of one. (meaning myself.) I learn alot from my own ramblings... it's how I process.

Seriously - from the bottom of my heart - I meant no offense to anyone by the things I write in this journal. I only meant to give a voice to my thoughts, my opinions, my observations, my feelings... I function better.. me.. I.. function better, when I get out of me the little things that build up inside of me. The things that make me wonder why people do the things they do...or how to reach them to help them change. I certainly don't blast them on their on journals... but I do sometimes get a 'build up' of thoughts and feelings after multiple repetive attitudes - both negative and positive... and eventually it somehow gets inputted into one of my lengthy diatribes... like this one.

Any who... I plan on having a wonderful day.. hope you have the same. Much Love.

---

305 ккал

Жир: 21,09г | Белк: 24,57г | Углев: 2,20г.   Завтрак: Black Label Fully Cooked Bacon, water (6-10 AM), hidden carbs, coffee (8oz) black, eggland's best eggs (9AM) (overeasy). подробнее ...