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06 августа 2020

Got up early and tried to get the place in some semblance of order so Nicole wouldn't come home to a disaster. Got Justeen moving and we pulled out without time for me to make her breakfast. Stopped at Wawa and grabbed two sizzli. She promptly decided that she didn't like hers and I ended up eating both...Went to Inovio and got my new laptop and then grabbed the girls at the airport. Coming home, Nicole was dismayed at the moisture in the basement and feared we would lose things to it. They reorganized while I ran out to buy fans. Afterwards, I picked up sushi as we chilled. Told Nicole about what was going on in the car ride from the airport. We're getting peppered with bills right now - she thinks the car took damage to the muffler during the storms two days ago and just all the work on the house, plus the added costs of spoiling Justeen are adding up. Fortunately, we are in good shape but I need to find a way to diversify my revenue. Inovio hasn't said a word, but in this market relying on a single gig - especially as a contractor - is a good way to get burned. Can't express how having Nicole home just centers me, I feel more relaxed. She means everything and even when she is busting my stones I am happier, more focused and more centered when she is around.

06 августа 2020

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136,7 кг 0 кг 38,3 кг Достаточно Хорошо
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04 августа 2020

Slept poorly. Stress and discomfort from whatever is going on. Up and down a few times, but eventually got some sleep. Woke up with a headache and was moving a bit tenderly. Took 3 ibuprofen and a vitamin, plus a tall glass of water. Feeling a bit better than last night, certainly. But, I'm not going to push it unnecessarily. Place is a shambles since I couldn't clean up last night. Going to take care of it today. Put a call into my doctor, we'll see when they can bring me in. Honestly, this has scared the bejesus out of me. I keep thinking I'm the over the hill athlete that I was three years ago, but all I am is a tub of goo. I've got too much to live for the piss it away on a carb addiction.

Seeing a cardiologist at 3pm, talking to Beth about taking up training again - of course, that will have to wait on the diagnosis. Still having some symptoms but muted.

Saw cardiologist, no evidence of heart problems. Going to schedule a stress test to confirm finding. Second possibility is stomach problems. Biting the bullet and going on Lipitor, Beta Blocker, Children's aspirin and something for my stomach. Only way to get off medication is to get serious working out and dropping pounds. Obvious, but I'm still pissed at myself.

In the meanwhile, starting to clear out some of the flooding in the basement. Moving a shopvac full of water repeatedly, some minor discomfort but nothing like the past two days. I'll take it as a good sign.

04 августа 2020

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137,8 кг 0 кг 39,4 кг Достаточно Хорошо
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03 августа 2020

Tracked successfully yesterday, diet was acceptable but taking Justeen out for dinner at a pizzeria hurt a bit. Had to lie down last night because of tightness in my chest, teeth and wrist. Either, I'm stressed out of my mind or my heart is talking to me. I don't know why I am so stressed, but I am.

Was feeling good this morning, until I started getting ready to take Justeen to camp when the discomfort kicked in. Not as bad as last night, but something is going on. I need to figure it out because it is too serious to ignore.

A rough day in that every time I attempted something semi-strenuous in minutes I would feel fatigue/pain. So, doing our yard took 3 rest breaks - pitful. Had to take the trash out front in stages. When I fed the cats, leaning over I was hit by dizziness.

Was way low in calories and what I had eaten was not ideal, but was in no condition to cook. So, I had two heaping bowls of cereal with milk. Exactly what I shouldn't be having on a diet, but afterwards I felt a lot better. I am wondering if I was too aggressive on cutting calories. It wouldn't explain the fatigue, chest discomfort and dizziness but I felt more energy after eating my poor meal than I had all day.

I need have already made healthy alternatives - and as terrible as it sounds a few months of being vegan is probably not a bad idea.

PS - pushed myself at the end of the day, walked briskly up from the basement to the second floor. Mistake. By the time I got to our room, I had to lie down and wait for 10+ minutes until I wasn't it a great deal of discomfort.
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