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Couldn't sleep most of the night. My ex husband's mother died and I learned about it by accident. Neither of my children informed me. I Nancy Drewed it from clues in a photo my granddaughter texted to me. She died Aug 17 and there was a memorial for the family yesterday. I didn't belong at the memorial and would certainly not have crashed it. The fact they withheld the information really did me in. I plan to send sympathy cards to the ex, his father, and two sisters. It's a tough loss for them.
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Sorry for the loss. 
27 авг 23 написано членом: Draglist
Thank you. She was a good person.  
27 авг 23 написано членом: LadyinDenim
I'm sorry to hear this. I liked my ex MIL too. She was a nice lady. All of his family were.  
27 авг 23 написано членом: -MorticiaAddams
My ex and his family are good people. I was the main problem in the relationship and he is better rid of me, so I get it. I think mailing a card will be OK, though. I am getting addresses off the internet and it feels a little stalkerish. I thought of sending the cards care of the cremation society that posted the obituary. That might be better. 
27 авг 23 написано членом: LadyinDenim
I loved my ex's mom. She treated me with love and respect and even though my DIL is married to someone else I still have a good relationship with her. I still call her my DIL... I think sending a card is a show of respect and leave it at that. 💜 
27 авг 23 написано членом: Diana 1234
I'm so sorry to hear this! Sending my condolences! (((HUGS))) for the entire family! 
27 авг 23 написано членом: ZenusWarriorPrincess
I am sorry, it was a loss for you as well. These things are complicated. We cannot just turn our feelings off. 
27 авг 23 написано членом: rcguenth
Don’t be hard on the kids. They’re in a difficult situation and they have to deal with the loss too. Nobody like to be the bearer of bad news, especially when it’s a complicated situation. 
27 авг 23 написано членом: jtj1001
Thank you for the condolences. The "kids" are aged 41 and 34. I decided to remain silent with them and just quietly send my sympathies to the exes via USPS because I really do feel badly for them. I remember when I was grieving the loss of my mom, reading sympathy cards actually did help a little. Just knowing other people care what you are going through means something. 
27 авг 23 написано членом: LadyinDenim
Good on you for not holding grudges! ...and yes ma'am, thoughts & kind words go a long way. 
27 авг 23 написано членом: ZenusWarriorPrincess
I just saw this thread. I'm sorry for your loss, of your ex MIL and for the loss of your connections to people who were once important in your life. This is an on-going scar, and the death in the family only brings up the hole in your life. I've got one of those gaping too. Sad. 
28 авг 23 написано членом: erikahollister
Thanks, Erika. My ex continues to be welcomed at my family functions, so he has been witness to weddings and babies born, he visited with my dad before he died and attended the funeral. My sisters, brother, and BIL love him. He and my hubs chat a bit at holidays. I lost touch with his family, although he tells stories about them once in awhile. Our daughter's birthday is Saturday and I hope he doesn't show. I would have to extend my condolences face to face, and I need more than a week before I'm ready to do that. 
28 авг 23 написано членом: LadyinDenim

     
 

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