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Please pray for me, I am so miserable tonight. Tomorrow, Saturday is the day of the Memorial Luncheon for our daughter. It's at a Chinese Restaurant so that takes most of the pressure off me but I'm still miserable. Tonight I bought 2 big cheesecakes at Costco, fresh blueberries for on top, and 3 orchids for the tables. I was shopping for 3 hours this afternoon for my friend and for us. Yesterday and part of today I was going through old pictures to find ones (of our daughter) to take tomorrow. What a trip down memory lane! It hurts, I hurt, and I can't even think straight about what I will say at the Memorial. I do have a pastor speaking, the same one as for our son's funeral. We are so old and isolated that there will only be 19 of us. There were 160 at our son's funeral. I don't want to go, I don't want to face it. My chest hurts, my head hurts, my face, and even my teeth hurt. I've been living on 4 hours of sleep a night. I haven't even picked out what I am going to wear. And I have one more store to go to in the morning for my sick friend. I'm binging again and have had so much food and sugar my stomach is yucky upset. I want to turn off the pain. Our son-in-law, all his friends, neighbors, and relatives are not even coming. If it weren't for the Lord carrying me I couldn't go on. Thank you, Lord. And thank You for all the comforts I have: food to eat, a warm dry place to sleep, a car to drive, and a comfortable house to live in. And I can still walk, even though it hurts with sciatica. Please comfort me, Lord, and thank you for loving us. Thank you that you see my pain. Thank you that you see and know that all these FS folks and I are here at this time in history when things may get very rough in the next several years. Thank you for giving us Jesus so we can be reconciled to you. Give us peace and courage. Help all these FS folks and me to sleep tonight. Bring your will into my life, and help me to accept it.
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God be with you through this day and all days! 
21 янв 23 написано членом: Texasgranny6
In our thoughts and prayers 
21 янв 23 написано членом: Daddy Manatee
You are strong. You are kind. You are loved. You are never ever alone. 🙏🙏🙏❣️ 
21 янв 23 написано членом: 2melons
St. Jude prayer for you 
22 янв 23 написано членом: HCB
Thank you all so much for your support and prayers! The Memorial Luncheon went about as well as it could. The room was suppose to be set the night before but it wasn't and with short staffs these days it took them a long time and was incomplete at that. The restaurant staff didn't exactly do all they said they would do and there were several snafus but in the end, there was enough food albeit some of it I had to demand and came late, I would say too late. They even charged me extra for the food that came late. Good thing I had the cheesecakes. Two people that said they wouldn't come to eat because they weren't willing to take off their masks in a restaurant but might pop in, showed up as we were going to eat and decided they would eat if they could sit away from everyone else. Awkward. Good thing I had Zip lock bags for the leftovers so could bag them myself. I had the 2 large wreaths with big black bows and streamers, and 3 orchids, then one friend brought flowers, and our son-in-law sent a vase of 12 long-stem red roses to the restaurant. I set up 2 tables with many pictures of our daughter in lovely frames I had in our home plus snapshots lying in front of them. There was a separate dessert table with an orchid and silver servers and a framed menu of our luncheon, so it was quite lovely. I skipped going to the store for my friend since we had to pick up someone out of our way, so we were there on time to set up before others came. I was able to cover my body with clothes but the first skirt I tried on wouldn't even start to zip. Good thing I have quite a few clothes (from local thrift shops. Even my husband said it went great but that the pastor spoke: "too long". It seemed fairly short to me being a memorial. I doubt it was over 10 minutes. I spoke for about 5 minutes. There were 20 of us at 3 tables in the banquet room. They had said we would be by ourselves but then booked a party of 12 and set up for them right up next to us, not even at the other end of the room. How could we have had a speaker? The restaurant even tried to give us their different menu selections. In the end after setting up late for us all they discovered the other group postponed 2 weeks. Maybe they found out we were something like a funeral. I wasn't prepared to speak but since I am so verbal 5 minutes wasn't a problem for me. I only told 3 stories about her then told how she was convinced she was leaving in the rapture and how quickly she died after cancer went to her liver. We only knew for 2 weeks, and she died only 3 days after they were telling her she could live quite a long time. I told them how our son died in a couple of minutes so none of us know about tomorrow or even 5 minutes from now. There is only one way to go to Heaven and I wanted all of them to go there! And I want you also there with me, with the wonderful love and acceptance we will have there. Open our hearts to Jesus and let Him come in. The alternative is unthinkable. It was your prayers that carried me. Thank you again.  
22 янв 23 написано членом: Snowwhite100
lcouch58, I'm sorry for the loss of your son less than 2 years ago. You know the pain. Thank you for your prayers. I too am praying for you. 
22 янв 23 написано членом: Snowwhite100
russkey2, thank you for wanting to spare me as much pain as possible, I really appreciate it and I don't mean to offend you, I really don't but I just couldn't help but giggle at the thought of me not going to my "party" so to speak, that I was throwing. Nineteen people standing in the banquet room with nothing set up, and then the wrong menu, being told there were another 12 people pressed right up to our tables. I was committed to spending several hundred dollars but the staff wasn't very committed to taking care of us. If I hadn't been there and been an organizer and asking for every last thing we needed the whole thing probably wouldn't have even taken place. I've had to leave more than one reception with never having gotten my food because they ran out. The staff was helping people in the main dining room. I was like a jack-in-the-box jumping up from my meal to ask for this and that from the 2 waiters that were taking care of a whole other room of luncheon diners on a Saturday. Good thing I had already promised one of the waiters something extra "under the table" in addition to their regular 15% tip on the whole meal. I was the "advocate" for the group, in addition to paying the bill. My husband is a "deer-in-the-headlights. Without me there I'm sure everyone would have left and maybe gone to In-N-Out burger. This is a neighborhood place for me. If I hadn't paid the bill I couldn't have gone back. Even now, the owner is not thrilled with me. Prices have gone up for him too, and he's being squeezed on both sides. He gave me a good price at a weakened moment and didn't want to keep it. We compromised but neither of us is thrilled. It was just "O.K.". At least we both kept our dignity so we can go back.  
22 янв 23 написано членом: Snowwhite100
Sending prayers  
22 янв 23 написано членом: RN16
Why would you even want to go back is the question.  
23 янв 23 написано членом: Kenna Morton
Ooops—- I’m so sorry that such a nice gesture on your part ended up being yet another painful disappointment for you..  
23 янв 23 написано членом: Kenna Morton
my prayers are with you snowwhite100, keep your head up, and continue to focus on all of the great things that God has done for you. Hugs  
23 янв 23 написано членом: buenitabishop
Thank goodness this ordeal is behind you. Perhaps life will settle into a new routine. So sad that this routine will not include your precious daughter. Stay strong and take care of yourself. I think of you often. 
25 янв 23 написано членом: rhontique
Thanks for stopping by my page. It was nice hearing from you. I'm sorry you are hurting so badly. I missed this post but you are always in my prayers. I hope you start getting better sleep. I struggle with that on and off myself. It's hard to take care of ourselves, especially when we hurt so much that we don't feel like we care about ourselves. I think that's the hardest thing I've struggled with. Tomorrow is a new day. One foot in front of the other. Sending you a big 🐻 hug. 
25 янв 23 написано членом: bearnoggin
It sounds like you did a lovely job to honor your daughter among friends and loved ones. I'm glad those people were there to support you in your time of intense, new grief, as are your FS friends here. I wish we could ease your pain. May your remaining prayers be answered this year and your physical and emotional suffering eased.  
28 янв 23 написано членом: kpwcalories
Hello snowwhite100 I'm checking in on you and I pray all is well. Miss you being here.  
08 мар 23 написано членом: buenitabishop
May you have peace during this time. My thoughts and prayers are with you 🙏 
02 апр 23 написано членом: biblepusher59

     
 

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