Good morning from cloudy Germany!
I have been to a birthday party by some friends of friends yesterday night. That reminded me my next birthday I'll be 30. I really don't feel like I am 30 years old!!! Actually, I feel like I am 20 or 22, with the only difference I just need more sleep now (at least 6 hours per night). I have to admit, I enjoy more the company of people who are in their early 20s rather than people my age. It's the first time in my life I prefer having younger friends than older friends. Maybe it's because I live life in a less "heavy" way then some years ago.
I forgot to weight in before breakfast, so it's too late now after my second cup of coffee and third glass of water. I gained weight during tha Xmas holidays, I don't know yet how many kilos. The good thing is, all my clothes fit perfectly. Yesterday night I have been able to wear some shorts I bought about 7 years ago. I have been able to wear them last July for the first time, and they were still a bit too tight on my legs. Now they are a bit loose, regardless of the Xmas disaster!! :)
When I look at myself in the mirror, most of the time I don't see myself as a fat person anymore. That's a good achievement, since what I saw back from the mirror all my life, was the image of a fat girl. Even if I was underweight all my childhood and teenage years and a normal weight after that. That's the bad influence from my family. The sister of my father is very powerful at that, convincing regular weight kids or adults they are fat. She still does it with my niece Lizzie, who is only "guilty" of eating normal kid portions instead of nothing, as her older sister does. And still,she's complaining Sophie does not eat enough. It's an easy and cheap way to control people by making them way less self confident than they should be. It really scares me the fact she has been a teacher at primary school for more than 30 years. I don't want to know how many kids' self esteem she destroyed just for the sake of it. She really is a nasty woman. I am glad I get to see her only twice a year.
What else? I am glad to be back home, in this cozy little town. I feel at home here, much more than in Italy. I have to work a few hours now, then I 'll go for a walk since it's quite warm today, to be January. Still need to get back into the super-positive mood I was in before holidays.
Have a good time fatsecreters! Life is good!
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![](https://m.ftscrt.com/static/images/box/membersicon.gif) Комментария
Welcome home, Lizzie. so when do you turn 30 which btw, my friend, is so very young? Sorry that people like your aunt can impact others negatively for life. There are so many of them.
06 янв 13 написано членом: Helewis
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Welcome back Lizzie. At the end of the day it is only a number. I will be 47 this year, & I am fitter & more active than I was in my twenties :) . I know people like your aunt . Always makes me wonder how they get away with such behaviour, its awful. Glad there is a lot of good people 2 . Have a good day.
06 янв 13 написано членом: schmetterling34
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I am happy your self image has improved. Mine of myself is not the greatest still. I remember my dad calling me miss piggy all the time because i would eat so much. I was never big though. I was only about 115 at 5'2 but even now when people tell me i look great i still feel fat. So many people say "You look great for having 5 kids" but it makes me wonder what would you say if I didn't have 5 kids? I look chubby? I want people to say i look good period. Sorry for talking so much about myself on your journal. Just really gets me how all the stuff people say have such an impact on our own self image
06 янв 13 написано членом: iamachristianjesusfreak
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Happy New Year new FS friend! Glad to hear you are back "home", ready for the new year to begin. I think we all have one or two people like your aunt in our lives, people who are insecure and need to put others down just to make themselves feel better...
06 янв 13 написано членом: barbabella
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Hey Lizzie welcome home and happy new year! I know what you mean about not feeling your age. .....I don't feel 42. A lot of people let the number define them and how they feel or act but I just can't. ..haha. Good for you that you don't either.
You will get back to that super positive mood...once you get back into your routine it will surprise you and just be there staring you in the face.
Have a great day and enjoy your nice weather.
06 янв 13 написано членом: jaime30024
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Hey, iamachris, my father an my mother used to call me with an Italian nickname that sounds like Fatty-Lizzie and I was 5'2" and 45kg (99lbs). And I kept thinking myself as fat for such a long time... It would be nice if people would say to us "U look good", but all in all, is it so important? It should be us telling ourselves every morning in the mirror that we look great, that we are great just for the fact of existing and having the opportunity of living. But we don't... Self image issues are really hard ones, I think it's so much related to the society we live in. I already see how less important is to look perfect here in Germany compared to Italy... In Italy that's really a collective obsession...
07 янв 13 написано членом: Lizzie983
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Hi barbabella! Happy new year to you as well! Yep, she did not achieve what she wanted from life, so she tries other people not to feel happy about themselves. The point is, when it's somebody I did not know well I did not care about comments about how I looked, but she is part of my family, to me it was really important what she said about me (when I was 10/12 years old).
07 янв 13 написано членом: Lizzie983
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Hey jaime! Right, that number should not define what we are supposed/able to do! Happy new year! And I really hope to get back to my routine and slowly into my good mood. Going home is always an "emotional shock" and it takes time to let all the feelings go.
07 янв 13 написано членом: Lizzie983
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